Adult children corral most of their energy into avoiding reality. It may not seem that way. They can be found in the trenches, running businesses and families, helping others, moving and shaking. Or they can be found in places of addiction, gambling, drinking and workaholism. Or they can nowhere be found: isolated, they keep themselves to themselves. All roads lead to Rome: avoiding reality.
This may be why a large segment of adult children are found in the Law of Attraction community. The Law of Attraction is the ability to attract into our lives whatever we are focusing on. The Law of Attraction community promote vision boards, wishful thinking, ordering from the Cosmos: it does not advocate getting “in there” and getting “your hands dirty”: it does not advocate all of “reality”.
Wikipedia states: Reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or might be imagined. Reality includes everything that is and has been, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible. A still broader definition includes that which has existed, exists, or will exist. Reality, life is complex and intertwined with all our experiences.
It is this complexity that creates pain in adult children. We are focused on avoiding the past. We spend a lot of energy trying to avoid remembering the intolerable reality of it. We use people, places and things to barricade us against it. The result is we attract inner feelings that are fearful and confused. “It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.” ― Philip K. Dick, VALIS
We live a split life trying to deal with the stress and pain of holding the past at bay. Our external appearance is so different from our inner reality that we fall into mental or physical illness or addiction in a covert effort to remove the painful feelings. It is the hidden aspect of the past reality that takes increased time and attention away from present important parts of our lives. We restructure the past so that the horrible things that happened in the past simply don’t exist, and if they don’t exist they no longer matter.
The definition of reality states differently. “Reality includes everything that is and has been, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible.” A still broader definition includes that which has existed, exists, or will exist.
Therefore, even if our reality states the past doesn’t exist, we cannot state that the past did not happen.
Here we see how our dark reality can co-exist with the Law of Attraction. How the Law of Attraction can help us face and recover from our negative experiences. The past exists in our mind and our body and our soul as does the future. Our aim is to remove the dark energy by facing it with safe others. We will then have the energy and be able to learn the skills to focus on and attract a future filled with safe others.